terfs keep mentioning the % of autistics who are trans/nb and that we’re ‘brainwashed’
and because i’m an asshole, i decided to look into why so many autistic folks are trans/nb. it’s not an inaccurate statement, at least the first half, but terfs lie through their teeth so i decided to get to the scientific root of it.
the answer blew my fucking mind.
the study on gender and autism i found said two very specific things about autistic people: we are more mentally resistant to things like social conditioning and binarism. we like our secret third things, y'know.
an excerpt:
“The finding that non-binary identities are most elevated seems to support hypotheses focussed on autistic resistance to social conditioning, which are consistent with existing evidence of the same effect with respect to self-description of sexual orientation. Perhaps elevated rates of trans identity in autism might result from a rejection of the binary cisgenderist norm, which combined with a below-typical concern for social norms could promote the disclosure of the identity.”
94% of autistics surveyed for that paper identified themselves as non-binary.
other studies have found autistic people have higher levels of critical thinking, and require more evidence to maintain or convert to a belief system (hence why many of us eventually fall away from religion) than allistic people.
which means, at least from my perspective, that:
a) the 'brainwashing’ terfs are accusing the trans community of inflicting on autistic folks would likely not even work if they tried.
b) the current binary definition of gender flies directly against embedded autistic modes of thinking to begin with.
you cannot brainwash someone into thinking something they already believe.
This essentially suggests that autistic people are likely to be NB because we are in fact resistant to the relevant brainwashing.
As an autistic person with a weird gender this lines up with my personal observation, which is that autistic people are not really prone to follow social norms that don’t make sense to them or provide them with any benefits just because.
There is an immense amount of cis allistic anxiety about this, because they like to think adhering to the gender binary is in the same natural-law category as “don’t kill someone for pissing you off” or whatever, and it completely isn’t, and our collective refusal to play ball makes something in them angry.
The typical allistic reaction to autists behaving unusually is to insist on controlling them, or treat their social “failures” as deficits of parental, workplace, partner, state, societal control. The idea that autistic people are “brainwashed” into being trans and nonbinary is in fact projection by people who want to brainwash autistic people to follow their stupid fucking rules, and are existentially terrified that they can’t seem to get it to work
The fact that you fear not being enough, not being able to get what you want, not feeling able to get where you want, that you feel so insecure about yourself is probably not just related with your childhood but also with past friendships or any other type of relationship that didn’t end well or in which you weren’t treated correctly. You were probably left out from group activities and jokes or not invited to places; you were made to believe you were very important but at the same time you were kept hidden and later you were left alone and forgotten as something of not great value; you were probably easily judged as uninterested because of your decisions or behaviours without asking for further reasons…
I know all these experiences (and many more than these ofc) hit you deep and now are rooted inside of you as a confirmation of your unworthiness and unlovability but it was not your fault. Or at least not just because of your decisions or behaviour (of which not everyone has the empathy to understand or even guess/imagine the reasons, if you don’t talk about it): in relationships there are always at least two people involved. And when one of them moves away or leaves you out of their life without asking for or giving an explanation, it’s a relationship that is already crumbling (and it’s best if it ended this way, even if it pains you because you felt guilty about it). When there’s not communication nor interest in the other and in their feelings, despite how strong and indipendent they may look, despite how far they may have moved, a relationship is already ended.
It’s not about your worth or lovability, which you possess just because you’re alive. It’s just about people’s decisions, it’s about lives taking different turns, it’s about the fact that some relationships just need to end or evolve into something different that is not a deep friendship anymore (if you both agree ofc). It’s about people growing and changing, and following their own path. Keep going on onto yours so to find new friends and even lovers if you want (cause you will anyway: life is made of cycles, as you had friends in the past, you’ll have friends in the future; as you didn’t have good friends in the past you will have good friends in the future. It’s all about you, you can change your life at any given minute. Take your time to understand your emotions and process them but then let the past go, heal and move on to something new -and even better, seen how you were treated).
my favorite thing that happens in TOS is when they encounter some weird shit and then sulu turns around to us/kirk to make sure we’re all seeing the same thing. anyways my favorite example of this is when they encounter abraham fucking lincoln.
this is a message for everyone who is 22. if you’re 22 please stop worrying. take a deep breath eat a bagel maybe. everything that feels impossible is going to work itself out. have a great day
do u have a message for 25 year olds
uhhhhh 2 bagels?
I’m 32. When I was in my early twenties, I overheard a pair of 50ish year old women talking about the ideal age to stay at permanently. One said, “Everyone says 25. I wouldn’t want to be in my twenties forever. Everything is hard and you get upset too easily.”
Hearing her say that helped me so much. I thought about it countless times. Every time things felt overwhelming, I remembered what she said. The words of this total stranger, who wasn’t even talking directly to me, brought me a lot of comfort, so I hope they can help you, too.
If memory serves, what happened was that someone took a video of a Ukrainian military band playing some other song and dubbed a realistic-sounding version of A Cruel Angel’s Thesis over it. This proceeded to be everywhere on the internet, enough so that the band that put on the original performance caught wind of it, and decided to capitalize on its popularity by actually performing the song. This video is the latter version.
